‘Did you pack your toothbrush?’
‘Yes, Mum. All in my bag, right here.’
‘What about a comb?’
‘Yes, Mum. Look at the clouds!’
‘And a spare pair of socks?’
‘Yes, Mum. Will they serve us drinks?’
‘How about swimmers? I packed mine. You never know how warm it can get.’
‘Yes, I packed swimmers. Oh! I can see another plane! Look, Mum.’
‘A book to read?’
‘Yes, three books, Mum. How cool is this tray table?’
‘Your nose needs blowing. Let me get you a tissue… hmmm…’
‘What’s wrong, Mum?’
‘It seems… I left my bag at home!’
Friday Fictioneers is a challenge set by Rochelle Fields where writers around the world create 100 word stories inspired by the one image. For more information see: http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/2014/07/30/1-august-2014/
50 responses to “Head in the clouds (Friday Fictioneers)”
Haha! Just brilliant, so busy fussing around someone else that your forget to make sure you have everything yourself. The dialogue in this is really wonderful.
Thank Carol. So glad you thought so 🙂
Very funny piece of dialogue. I can picture the conversation easily. Nicely done
Thank you! Glad you could picture it 🙂
It seems Mum was the one with her head in the clouds, eh? Love the dialogue and the twist at the end. Well crafted.
Thanks Rochelle! It’s an inspiring photo – where was this taken?
Tee hee 🙂
Thanks for the read!
No going back for it now. 🙂
Nope, looks like she’ll be stuck wearing child-size swimmers if it gets too warm!
Shame, that! And all this time Mum could have been enjoying the view! 🙂
Oh yes, she’s already missed so much!
Hahahaha! Oh, that’s a nightmare in the daytime! Good one, Jessie.
Thank you! Glad you liked it.
This is delightfully funny! Thanks for the smile.
Glad I could trigger that response 🙂
Hahaha, fabulous. Just fabulous. I tip my hat to you, Jessie.
Thank you so much. I tip my hat back 🙂
Sounds like something I would do….lol! Great story! 🙂
Haha, I’m glad you thought so!
Good, believable dialogue. And a great ending–sounds just like a Mum.
All my best,
Thank you for reading and for the lovely comment Marie!
Ha ha! Great story, Jessie, and all in very authentic dialogue. Interesting to see how you used the non-word ‘hmmm’ – works well here.
I know! I thought of our group discussion the other day when I typed this… And I wondered if it worked. Thanks for the feedback!
fun story – dialogue.
Could of been my mother, but at the end, mine would have said “never-you-mind” just pass me your napkin.
Haha thanks Randy. That’s funny!
Ha! Nice story Jessie with great dialogue.
Thank you Maree 🙂
Been there. Done it. Still do. (Anyone seen my keys?)
Haha, thanks Patrick.
That was good! I enjoyed your bit of flash! ^..^
I don’t normally like flash fiction that is entirely dialogue, however, I thought you did a wonderful with the dialogue. And I certainly chuckled at the end. Well written!
Thank you! I’m really glad you liked this one.
A classic turnaround story. Very well done.
Thanks Doug, glad you liked it!
Wonderful! And missing the clouds and the action outside the window as well. 😀
Thank you 🙂 Yes, she’s missed a lot!
Ha Ha! I am heading that way too. This morning kids dropped to school bus stop, dog fed, bin cleaned out, dishes put away and all in time to catch my bus to work. Except I had left my wallet at home with my travel card inside.
Oh no! ! At least you can laugh about it 🙂
Oh a Mum’s delimna! It happens to all at least once!
Thanks Claudia 🙂
It’s like you wrote about me! Not that I’m a mum yet…but I tend to worry about what everyone else is carrying and then forget to carry what I need in the end!
Haha glad you thought so!
Dear Jessie – Priceless! So true it happens all the time! This has happened to me. Thanks, Nan 🙂
Glad you liked it, thanks Nan!
A story in dialogue. Sound like a story of me packing. 🙂
Haha thanks Lily.